Last week my iTunes software was acting up. Every time I played a song it sounded all fuzzy and after ruling out my speakers, headphones and my pc I called up the iTunes folks on the phone but they weren’t able to help me. I then sent an email to their tech support asking for help (so far no reply..Bastards). Well on Friday morning when I was getting ready for work I shutdown my laptop (I usually put it on standby go to work and plug it into my docking station so it doesn’t take forever to boot up). Low and behold when I tried my iTunes when I got to work it was working fine.
Sometimes I get the urge to just shutdown and wait…wait for my problems or issues to fix themselves in some weird unknown computer matrix. I remembered my little iTunes dilemma and solution yesterday afternoon as I thought about my friend A’s news. Her boyfriend of just exactly a year broke up with her Saturday night and she was devastated but all she could think about was having to restart from scratch. Those who read the old blog may remember her from “the Do Opposites Attract” post (since I deleted that blog I can’t link the post). Some of the reasons he sited for the breakup had to do with whether or not he could see himself living with her as husband and wife and that he didn’t like what he’s become in the relationship (in an effort to meet her demands he’s been slack on doing some of the things he wants to do). He also questioned if their families would get along (she’s from a liberal democrat family and he’s a staunch republican) and he wasn’t sure he loved her enough for marriage. He also cited their inability to effectively communicate their problems.
As I ran my errands I thought about my friend’s situation and wondered if she needed to forgo the restarting function and just shutdown for a while. In her conversation with me she mentioned having to restart her search for a life mate and I wondered if shutting down and figuring out what was going wrong with her relationships and figuring herself out would probably be best. She acknowledges the challenges she brings to the table in a relationship, she’s demanding, clingy and needs a lot of attention yet she doesn’t attract the type of man who is willing to be all those things for her and still fit her own top 10 list of musts. She wants someone who is attractive, who can afford her (she’s high maintenance), yet doesn’t want someone who travels excessively for work or pleasure, and who is willing to spend all his free time with her. She also expects them to spend at least 5 nights out of the week together. She does admit that she’s a challenge but doesn’t think she can change.
We’ll talk this evening and I know she’ll want me to listen and she’ll also want my advice and I’m going to have to tell her to shutdown and give herself time to figure out what she’s willing to comprise on from the start otherwise she’ll find herself in a similar situation a year and a half from now.