How many of us have them. I’ve been thinking about friends and friendships a lot lately and no wonder since it’s all over the internet and on everyone’s blogs. Falling out also seems to be a regular occurrence both in real life and in the blog world.
I don’t think I’ve been mad enough at a true friend to have a falling out with them but I have had a true friend stop speaking to me several times because of something she felt I did to her. She stops speaking to me at least once every two years and when she lived in DC it was at least once every six months I often wonder why she even bothers to continue the friendship. She’s also next level with the drama so I sometimes try to stay clear since I try to lead a drama free life. I’ve had friendships that over time have dwindled only to be re ignited once both or one of us decides to reach out to the other on a regular basis.
Sometimes distance is especially hard and if both people don’t put in the effort to keep in touch and update then it will just slide. I have a friend who lives in Las Vegas who isn’t an oldest and dearest friend from grade school but is one I made about 5 years ago. We hung out and spoke often when she lived in DC but now that she moved our friendship has continued but on an every other month catch up session. I actually have a few friends from H.S and college who I don’t speak to every day or even every week but still consider good friends and know if I needed something they’d do what they could for me. Sometimes we loose touch with people because we’ve outgrown each other or no longer have enough in common to sustain a true friendship. I was talking to a friend on IM tonight and she asked about a mutual friend that she no longer talks to. She said something to me that made me pause and think for a moment, “sometimes I think friends go through so much together there is nowhere to go but apart. Sometime you find your way back sometimes you don’t.” That and other aspects of our conversation reminded me that sometimes the level of friendship you have with someone in your mind and with your actions isn’t the one they have with you.
I’ve been thinking about my best friend from HS lately. I haven’t spoken to her in almost 9 years and lately I’ve wondered what she’s up to. If she’s married, has a child, if her family still lives in the same place. I can’t think of what really drew us apart except to say we grew apart; maybe a different out look on life and different directions. I’ve been thinking about calling her for the last six months but haven’t made an effort to. I think I still know her number by heart; I called it almost every day for the four years that we were in HS together.
Edit: I just called my friend from HS and she was so excited to hear from me. Just like I have, she's been thinking about me on and off for the last 9 years. She still lives in the same apartment and has the same phone number that I remember from HS (NYC's never move I swear!) lol! We're meeting for lunch next week when I go up for the holidays.